Real.

I read so many blogs. Blogs about newlywed couples, my friends going on missions, people from school getting engaged; you name it. I read so many blogs about so many people in so many different stages in life. I read these blogs and all I see is the fluff. The couple together through high school who got married after his mission and have the perfect wedding videos and wedding and instagram and film together for a living. The couple who fell in love in the last three months of his mission via letters and had the most perfect wedding and marriage and she loves nail polish and bakes lots of cookies. The girl who writes about bands and scriptures and fashion and has everything in her life so entirely put together. As far as their blogger world is concerned, their lives are perfect.

I know I've been absent from blogging since I left for college, and I think that's why. My life isn't perfect. My nails last one day before they're chipped and I often don't have time to repaint them, I had to skip that California trip because I didn't have enough money, my room is messy most of the time. I don't have a boyfriend who loves me or a pretty engagement ring on my finger. My car runs out of gas quicker than I'd like and instead of spending my paycheck on that longboard I'm drooling over or that pair of sunglasses at Nordstrom, I'm putting money down for my apartment. I don't have a good relationship with my extended family and I am not a huge advocate of family parties because I don't feel loved there. (If anyone in my extended family is reading this, please don't give me pity or call me to say you love me. I'm fine.) I have a hard time with things and sometimes just cry because I'm a girl and I'm hormonal. And this is the truth of it; the real.

The reality of it is that even though my life isn't perfect, my life is so good. I have a family that loves me and I love them. I have a best friend that brings me caramel apples at work and goes on Sunday drives to the temple with me just to talk about life. I can't sleep on Sunday nights because I receive emails from the most lovely boy in the whole entire world each Monday morning. I swim for Brigham Young University and love my team. I always have cupcakes to bake, clothes to wear, and a place to call home. 

I sat outside the other day calling my brothers' lacrosse faceoffs with running shorts on and my hair in a topknot. We were laughing and playing and the sun was shining down over us. And that's what makes life beautiful.

I'm not here to be perfect, I'm here to be real. I'm so thankful for this beautiful life God has blessed me with, and from now on, I'm determined to live it to the fullest.

I'm back, guys.